The Link between ADHD and the Festive Period: Why It Feels Harder than Expected (and what helps)

What makes this period difficult for most individuals is that this season should ideally be a time for slowing down and catching up with family members. However, if you have ADHD or think you might, you may discover that this period can be very stressful.

Relief may give way to feelings of pressure building, overwhelm, feelings of being ‘not doing the festive season right.’ But if so, know that this is not uncommon and not a sign of failure by any means. There are many compelling reasons why the festive season may be particularly tough for the ADHD brain.

This advice is aimed at adults who are awaiting a diagnosis for ADHD, as well as those who live with the condition and are on medication.

The lead-up to the festive season, and pressure, procrastination, and burnout.

In the days before the festivities begin, it is common for adults with ADHD to witness this kind of phenomenon:

• Too many deadlines at the same time
• Trouble prioritising what really need to be done
• Putting things off – then experiencing panic in trying to catch up
• Working harder, but feeling less effective.

ADHD affects planning, organising, or initiation of tasks. When all tasks feel like they are of high priority, the brain goes into shutdown instead of action modes.

When the festive season comes, instead of feeling relaxed, people may feel:

• Mentally exhaustion
• Guilty about unfinished work
• Preoccupied and unable to switch off
• Feels low in mood or irritable
• Feeling burnt out

It is definitely hard for a person to relax when their mind is still full of activity, though.

Socialising, drinking, and acting on impulsivity

Social engagements will often have a significant influence during the festive period and most social engagements will centre around alcohol. For adults with ADHD, this can be tricky.  Inhibition and impulsivity are traits that are associated with ADHD, and alcohol use will lower the inhibition level even more. People may find themselves:

• Drinking more than intended
• Saying or doing things you later regret
• Taking risks you wouldn’t normally take
• Feeling emotionally reactive

If you are on ADHD medication

Alcohol still affects you even while on stimulant medication. The effect is not counteracted. Moreover, the drugs will sometimes mask the intoxication effect itself. The consequence will lead to excessive consumption.

“Combining alcohol with ADHD medications may cause:”

• Increase impulsivity
• Disrupt sleep
• Put extra strain on the heart
• Affect judgment concerning driving and personal safety

What you may want to do is choose your limits, arrange transport, or choose alcohol-free options, it is about self-care, not restriction.  Please speak to your doctor about your medication and the steps to take regarding drinking alcohol.

Festivities, Disrupted Routine, and Family Matters

Many adults with ADHD may not appreciate how much they need routine until they no longer have it. Employed or in education, they have a routine as well as deadlines to help motivate them. When that suddenly stops, the days can feel uncomfortably unstructured.

This can show up as:

• Restlessness or boredom
• Difficulty regulating emotions
• Feeling “lost” or unproductive
• Increased irritability or low mood

Family time can stir things up

Spending more time with family can also bring old patterns back to the surface. Long-standing misunderstandings, unresolved frustrations, or conversations about past difficulties may reappear, especially if ADHD has affected relationships over many years.

Even positive comments can turn out to be triggers when you are already emotionally drained.

Practical ways to take care of yourself during the festivities

Be gentle on yourself

It’s a genuinely tough time of year on the ADHD brain. Having struggles does not mean that you are lazy, unappreciative, or doing something wrong.

Try reframing the question from:

“Why can’t I cope like everyone else?”

to

“What does my brain need at this moment?”

Maintain a gentle structure

You do not need a structured schedule for this project:

• Regular sleep and meals
• Adhering to a medicine routine,
• One or two simple “anchors” per day (e.g., a walk, one task, one connection)

Use your social energy wisely

• The ability to say no and leave on time
• Not all invitations require a yes
• Implement recovery time after social outings

Be intentional about alcohol

• Define your limits before going out
• Alternate with non-alcoholic beverages
• Don’t depend on willpower alone
• Do not drive if you’re over the limit

Talk openly – where it feels safe

Sharing with the people you trust what you need from them or how you can help yourself will take some of the pressure off. This could mean letting them know that you need quiet time or just being straight with them that you are finding things more difficult than you thought you would.

Take responsibility without guilt.

ADHD: Because of this, it’s harder to do these things – it doesn’t mean that you don’t care. Focus on repair and not self-blame. Small and thoughtful actions make a big difference.

Reach out for help if you feel you need it

If emotions become unbearable, relationships become challenged, and/or alcohol and/or impulsive behaviours become hard to control, it is essential that a helping hand be sought. A professional, licensed therapist and/or coach can be a huge help and especially during times when change is occurring.

A final word

The festive period is not a trial by which your competence in managing or measuring your level of appreciate is determined. It is a perfect maelstrom of challenges for the average adult with ADHD.’

To do “well” this season isn’t to do more; it’s to be self-aware, plan out of compassion, and place a high emphasis on safety and balance.

If you are waiting for an assessment and find yourself in this description, simply recognising this is a big step.

References

• NICE (2018, updated 2023). ADHD: diagnosis and management (NG87)
• NHS. ADHD in adults
• Barkley, R. A. Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
• Kooij et al. (2019). European consensus statement on adult ADHD
• Wilens & Morrison (2011). ADHD and substance use disorders

 

 

Understanding Your Child’s Autism Profile: Building on Strengths and Supporting Needs

 

When you first receive an autism diagnosis for your child, it’s natural to have a wide range of questions and emotions. The word diagnosis itself can sometimes feel a little confusing. Autism is not something your child has “developed” or “caught.” It isn’t an illness or disease. Rather, it’s a way of describing how your child’s brain has been wired from the very beginning.

Autism is a neurotype: a difference in the way a person thinks, learns, feels, and experiences the world. There are many different neurotypes; for example ADHD, dyslexia, and dyspraxia – and of course what’s often described as neurotypical brains too. Neurotypical simply means the most common way that brains develop and process the world, but it doesn’t mean “better,” only more common.

Within autism, just as within any neurotype, there is huge variety. Some autistic people may need more support day-to-day than others, but every individual has their own unique strengths, interests, and abilities.

For some families, a diagnosis feels like confirmation of what has always been there; for others, it can bring new insights and understanding. Either way, it provides a framework to make sense of your child’s experiences and a language to explain them to others. Most importantly, it helps your child begin to understand themselves; giving them words to describe how they experience the world and supporting a positive sense of identity. With the right recognition and support, this understanding becomes a foundation for them to thrive.

What Does “Spectrum” Really Mean?

In both of the main medical systems used to describe autism, the DSM-5 and the ICD-11, you’ll see the term Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). This is the language still used in healthcare and research. You may also hear people talk about Autism Spectrum Condition (ASC), which is often used in schools and services in the UK.

The word spectrum itself can cause confusion. Some people assume it means a child can be “a little autistic” or “very autistic,” as though autism exists on a straight line from mild to severe. But that’s not what it means. Instead, it reflects the range of different ways autism can present, with shared traits that show up differently in each person.

It’s also worth knowing that many voices within the autistic community prefer to use language that feels more affirming. For example, describing someone as autistic (identity-first language) rather than as “a person with autism.” This reflects the view that autism is an integral part of who a person is, not something separate from them.

Best practice today also moves away from talking about “levels” of autism, because these labels can be both misleading and unhelpful. It’s more accurate, and respectful, to talk about an individual profile of strengths, differences, and needs.

And just as no two neurotypical people are the same, no two autistic people are the same either. Every child still has their own personality, preferences, and interests that make them who they are. Autism doesn’t take away that individuality; it simply shapes how they experience the world and express themselves.

For example, one child may experience significant sensory sensitivities but enjoy social interaction, while another may find conversation very draining but feel less affected by sensory input. Neither child is “more” or “less” autistic – they are both autistic, with unique profiles.

Why Understanding the Profile Matters

Taking time to understand your child’s autism profile isn’t just helpful for you as a parent; it’s powerful for your child too. When they have the language to explain how their brain works, they can begin to advocate for themselves. They might say, “I find bright lights hard,” or “I need more time to think before I answer,” and be understood.

For you, this understanding can shape how you support them day-to-day. Knowing that your child has a deep need for routine, for example, means you can prepare them for changes ahead of time. Recognising that their focus on special interests is a source of joy and comfort means you can encourage and celebrate those passions, instead of seeing them as “fixations.”

Building on Strengths, Supporting Needs

Every child has strengths, and autistic children are no different. Some may have incredible attention to detail, creativity, or honesty. Others may excel in problem-solving, memory, or specialist knowledge about their favourite subject. When we shine a light on these strengths, it helps build your child’s confidence and self-esteem.

At the same time, it’s important to recognise and support the areas that are more challenging. This might mean:

• Adjusting environments to reduce sensory overwhelm
• Giving extra processing time during conversations
• Helping them develop tools for emotional regulation
• Educating peers, teachers, and family about what autism means for your child

It’s not about “fixing” difficulties; it’s about recognising your child’s natural wiring and helping them build skills and strategies that make life feel more manageable, at home, at school, and beyond. Taking time to understand your child’s profile means you can support them in ways that really fit who they are, and it also helps them develop the confidence to understand and express their own needs.

Post-Diagnostic Support at The Retreat Clinics

At The Retreat Clinics, we offer post-diagnostic support sessions to help families make sense of what an autism diagnosis means in everyday life. These sessions can be held directly with your child, or with you as parents or as a family. They provide a safe, supportive space for reflection and psychoeducation, helping you and your child understand what autism means for them. Together, we use practical tools to explore your child’s unique autism profile, mapping out their strengths, needs, and experiences. This process not only deepens understanding but also supports you and your child to develop strategies and language that build confidence, self-awareness, and a stronger sense of identity; strategies that can be embedded both at school and at home.

👉 To learn more about our post-diagnostic support and how we can work alongside your family, please call 01904 412 551 or email hello@theretreatclinics.org.uk

 

Selby Neurodiversity Advice Event

Showcasing Our Neurodevelopmental Service at the “Selby Neurodiversity Advice” Event

Yesterday, Emma Warren spent the day with Selby PCN at the Selby Neurodiversity Advice event, held in the beautiful surroundings of Selby Abbey.

It was a fantastic opportunity to meet so many people, share information about our Neurodevelopmental Service, and talk about our Post Diagnostic Support and Psychological Therapies for Neurodivergent Adults. Emma also connected with other service providers to help ensure people are signposted to the right support.

We were thrilled to see Selby Town PCN sharing our Post Diagnostic Support flyers at their stall — a great example of partnership working in action.

We’re also excited to share that our private Adult ADHD service currently has no waiting list, and our Children’s Private Autism and Post-Diagnostic Service is offering appointments within two weeks — helping families access support quickly when they need it most.

A big thank you to Emma for representing our team and helping raise awareness of the support available for neurodivergent adults and children in our community.

If you would like to book an appointment into one of our services or just want more information, please email hello@theretreatclinics.org.uk

“Dad, What’s Autism?” – How to Talk to Children About Autism

“Dad, What’s Autism?” – How to Talk to Children About Autism

Explaining autism to children can feel daunting. You might not feel like you fully understand it yourself, or you may worry about saying the “wrong” thing. Children are naturally curious, though, and that curiosity is a positive starting point. Often it’s our own preconceptions or anxieties that make us clam up.

One of the best first steps is to reflect on your own understanding: what does autism mean to you? Do you feel confident in how you’d explain it? If not, that’s okay. These conversations don’t have to be perfect, and they don’t have to happen all at once. What matters is being open, honest, and willing to learn alongside your child.

This guide offers some tips and starting points to help you feel more comfortable when your child asks questions like “What’s autism?” or when you want to introduce the topic yourself.

 Be Curious About Their Curiosity

If your child asks about autism, take a moment to understand where the question is coming from.

• Have they met or become friends with someone who is autistic?
• Have they heard it mentioned at school or on TV?
• Are they trying to make sense of differences they’ve noticed in others or themselves?

Asking gentle follow-up questions can help you pitch your explanation at the right level and connect it to their world.

Keep It Simple and Honest

Children don’t need long technical explanations. They need clarity, reassurance, and words they can relate to.

• For younger children: You don’t need complicated explanations. One way to frame it is through the idea of different neurotypes. We all have a brain, and our brain is like the engine room that helps us think, learn, and understand the world. Brains can work in different ways, and one of those ways is an autistic brain. An autistic brain notices, processes, and responds to the world differently. That difference is part of what makes someone who they are.
• For older children, you can go into a little more detail about how an autistic brain might work. You might explain that autistic brains can sometimes notice details that other people miss, or that they can find patterns more easily. You might talk about how some autistic people experience the world very vividly, which can make bright lights or loud noises uncomfortable, but can also make interests and passions feel especially powerful. You could explain that moving between tasks or changes in routine can sometimes feel harder, because the autistic brain likes to know what to expect.

Celebrate Difference and Individuality

One of the most important messages for children to hear is: no two autistic people are the same because no two humans are the same. Autism is one part of who someone is, and every autistic person has their own personality, interests, and needs.

That also means the kind of support an autistic child might need can vary. Some may need help with certain activities at school, while others may not. Children often notice these differences, and talking about them openly helps remove mystery or stigma.

Introduce Positive Role Models

It can be powerful for children to see autistic people represented as role models, whether that’s authors, scientists, athletes, or creators. Sharing these stories shows that autism is not something to hide or fear, but something that can shape unique talents and perspectives.

From well-known figures like Greta Thunberg to local or family role models, these examples help children see the real, positive impact of neurodiversity in the world.

Make Use of Stories and Resources

Books and videos can be a really helpful way to support these conversations. They give children another way to access the information, at their own pace, and allow them to dip in and out as their curiosity grows. Some useful resources include:

• Books: Wonderfully Wired by Louise Gooding,
• Videos: Amazing Things Happen by Alexander Amelines (via the National Autistic Society)
• TV/Online: Pablo – Talking to Your Child About Autism (CBeebies website)
• Organisations:
  • The Curly Hair Project – comics, animations, and stories based on lived experience
  • The National Autistic Society – wide range of parent and child-friendly resources

These resources can help children explore autism in ways that are engaging, relatable, and affirming.

Keep the Conversation Going

Explaining autism isn’t a one-time event. It’s an ongoing conversation that will grow and change as your child does. They might return with new questions after something happens at school, after watching a film, or as they develop more self-awareness.

You don’t need to have all the answers at once. What matters is showing that you’re open to talking, listening, and learning together.

Why These Conversations Matter

When we talk to children about autism, we’re not only helping them understand themselves or their peers,  we’re shaping a more compassionate and inclusive future. Neurodiversity is a part of human variation. By recognising this difference as part of the variety of life, we help children grow up seeing it as a valuable and part of the very fabric of our communities.

So, the next time your child asks, “What’s autism?”, see it as the opportunity it is. You don’t need the perfect answer, what matters most is starting the conversation.

And if you think your child may be neurodiverse, or you’ve recently received a diagnosis, you don’t have to navigate the journey alone. At The Retreat Clinics, we’re here to support you and your family with understanding, confidence, and practical strategies every step of the way.  Call 01904 412 551 to book an appointment today.

 

Men’s Mental Health

Statistics tell us that men are not referred to talking therapist as often as women and are less
likely to be diagnosed with a mental health condition, however three quarters of suicidal
deaths involve men. We also know that “suicide is the single leading cause of death for men
under 35” (James’ Place, 2025) and that “men are three times more likely than women to die
by suicide” (James’ Place, 2015). What a tragic and sad picture these statistics paint and
what a responsibility we have as mental health support providers to try and educate, de-
stigmatise and innovate the services we offer men.

So why do men struggle to access Mental Health Services?

We might ask why we find ourselves in these circumstances today, and I believe that the
causes are multi-layered and complex. I would suggest the following as part of the problem:

Cultural and Societal Influences

Often, men internalise historical messages, such as “man-up”, “boys don’t cry” and “you
need to be strong” and these have a major role in creating barriers to accessing help,
inducing shame, and this then serves to increase the isolation men can feel. I don’t however
feel that this is the whole picture.

The pressure of expectations

In a highly pressurised world, sometimes the expectations places on us, by others and also
by ourselves, are too high to achieve. No amount of struggling and striving will ever get us to
the point that we, or others might expect, and trying to achieve it can leave us exhausted
and feeling like a failure through no fault of our own. Being able to moderate these
expectations and become more realistic is essential in helping to relieve pressure.
Nowadays a lot of us also seem to have a very active internal critic that is constantly picking
at us and grinding us down. Learning how to quieten this internal critic will enable us to build
a defence to these life demands without cost to our self-esteem.
Service provision

Perhaps we, as mental health providers have a role to play too? Are our services accessible
and suitable for men? Can we offer choice? Do we expect men to fit in with our general
service provision? Here, at the Retreat, we have given thought to these challenges and in
doing so can offer out of hours appointment, we have male therapists too and when
accessing a new client, we focus on the specific needs of each client so that they can
access a suitable model of therapy, and the right therapist that will help them achieve the
best possible outcome. We encourage a collaborative approach so that men feel
empowered and have autonomy when choosing their therapy and how they work in it.
Likewise, we consider the holistic nature of a person’s psychological wellbeing and may
make signposting recommendations to further support individual clients between sessions.
We know that therapy works, providing the relationship between client and therapist is
strong, and these are some of the things that we are focusing on when offering a therapeutic
intervention.

What can you do?

Society too has a role play in supporting, or better still, encouraging men, to express their
vulnerability and emotions. Too often men have felt that they need to repress such feelings
and this can be harmful. Likewise supporting men to move away from the mindset that they
must “fix” themselves and into a mindset of letting others help, would be a huge change for

the better. There seems to be so much shame associated with not being able to deal with
the pressures of life. Communities that come together in acknowledgement that they can’t
cope are communities that are stronger. These communities send out a clear message that
it’s okay, not to be okay, you are not alone, and recovery is possible.

There is more than one way out.

Finally, when in crisis and feeling like death is the only control you have left, reaching out to
organisations like the Samaritans or Shout can provide a safe, confidential, anonymous
space for you to talk. Likewise, don’t rule out GP/NHS support, which can not only provide
medication support but also access to therapy.

Recovery is possible and I believe that part of the treatment is connection with a supportive
other/s, thereby driving away the isolation and being non-judgementally heard, in a
confidential and safe place, with acceptance and compassion. Perhaps there really is some
truth in that saying “a trouble shared, is a trouble halved”?

In you are in need of mental health support, help is just a phone call away…

Samaritans: Call 116 123 (free, 24/7 support for anyone in distress).

Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM): Call 0800 58 58 58 (free, 5 PM to midnight daily).

Shout: Text 85258 (free, 24/7 text support service).

Mind: Call 0300 123 3393 or text 86463 (for mental health information and support).

Papyrus HOPELINEUK: Call 0800 068 4141 or text 07860 039967 (for young people under 35 experiencing thoughts of suicide).

 

References: https://www.jamesplace.org.uk/facts-and-
figures/#:~:text=Three%20quarters%20(4%2C213)%20of%20these,average%2C%20135%20people%20are%20
affected.

Availability in our Post Diagnostic Support Service for Autistic Adults

How Adult Therapy Can Improve Your Relationships and Career

In a world of high expectations and diverse needs we can feel lost within work/benefit systems that don’t see us, relationships that don’t satisfy us and family’s that we can’t engage with. We know that mental health is impacted by numerous things including social, psychological and economic factors, and these can leave people struggling to find a place of community, security, or to feel in control of their world. As a result, they might feel ill-equipped to deal with these demands and not know how to manage the pressures they feel, and the implications for their mental health can be severe. 

Today we are seeing anxiety and depression rates climbing, and the provision of good quality mental health therapy for adults is clearly needed. Adult psychotherapy provides people with a safe, confidential and supportive space in which to explore, gain understanding, challenge and source coping strategies. Having a safe and confidential place to talk to a trained psychotherapist can make a real difference to the way we experience self, others and life.  

So what help is available? According to some estimations, there are over 500 types of therapy for adults in use today, and theses vary enormously, such as art therapy, emotionally focused therapy, gestalt therapy, psychoanalysis, transactional analysis, the list goes on. These therapies ranging from very structured programmes such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and Cognitive Analytic Therapy, within which a therapist will utilise specific activities with clients to gain understanding and influence change. Or at the other end of the spectrum lies Psychoanalysis and Psychodynamic Therapy during which the unconscious will be made conscious, the unknown, known. There really is a therapy for everyone. These adult therapies, whilst differing considerably from each other, all aim in some way to help a person identify, understand and potentially change troubling emotions, thoughts, and behaviours. 

Here at the Retreat Clinics, we appreciate that the world of adult psychotherapy is complex and daunting at the best of times, but even more so when those looking for help are weighted down with their mental health concerns. That is why we offer all our clients an initial assessment with an experienced therapist to establish what their needs are, what sort of therapeutic approach they might prefer and can talk them through the therapy options, with recommendations tailored just for them.   

Adult psychotherapy really can make a difference, with widespread benefits that can impact positively on both our work and private life. Regarding our work life, we might spend large amounts of time at work and if this is a stressful or toxic environment then we might start experiencing anxiety, depression, fatigue or poor self-esteem. A positive work environment, alternatively, can support confidence, sociability and be a place of growth. We also know that our mental health directly impacts our productivity and performance. When individuals are mentally healthy, they can concentrate better, make informed decisions, and maintain high levels of productivity. Therapy can help provide an objective overview of life experiences, in addition to providing a more in-depth exploration of the experience. Self-support strategies and coping skills can be important elements of therapy and with the help of your therapist, you will be supported to make change, internal and external, to bring emotional relief and resolution of problem/s. 

Your therapist will provide support for you to identify self-care strategies that will help you deal with stress/burnout. These strategies might be practical, cognitive or related to emotional regulation, but more importantly, your therapist will explore with you what the blocks might be to implementing these strategies and using them regularly. Often, we know what we should do for our own self-care, but perhaps we don’t choose to do it. 

Time away from work is critical in maintaining our mental health. Being able to regulate your work life balance to you and your loved one’s satisfaction (if in a relationship) might not be as simple as it sounds. Therapy can help you understand the underlying messages that might ‘drive’ your work ethic and explore the consequences of doing so. As we learn to understand ourselves better, we can find our ability to make choices in life much easier. Indeed, self-awareness will support you to engage in roles in which we can thrive and grow, rather than placing expectations on self that are impossible to meet.   

Likewise, the impact on our private life can be substantial. When our mental health is good, we can engage more with those we have relationships with and are better able to manage conflict. Whether a client accesses individual adult therapy or relationship therapy, both have potential to support better overall relating. Therapy helps us to look at ourselves, understand why we do what we do or are how we are, and this helps you then to understand better our relational style, for example, if our communication style is combative this doesn’t make for a harmonious and peaceful relationship. Sometimes having awareness of this will provoke the change itself, other times however it is an opportunity to talk to those also being affected and help them understand too. We all need to be able to regulate our own emotions and this enables us to be more clearly seen and heard. From this you have an opportunity to grow and develop new patterns of relating, thereby strengthening your relationships. Adult therapies will help you gain insights into why you might be feeling the emotions that you do, as well as give support to explore alternative patterns of behaviour, rewiring the brain to respond differently.   

Therapy for adults will support you to gain better self-awareness, and through this you may find self-expression much easier. Often the therapy setting is a place to practice communication skills and improve emotional literacy. Communication is both verbal and nonverbal and part of a therapist’s role, depending on the therapy engaged in, is to consider holistically what a client is saying and to reflect any disconnects and observations. They will be able to offer insights and supportive questioning to enable you to deepen your understanding, whilst offering a safe place in which to answer these questions and explore the meanings of your responses. Support is also given to understand our emotions and explore how best to regulate them.  We live in a richly diverse world and with all difference there is the potential for conflict or disagreement. Understanding self will support you to relate differently with others and to communicate your authentic self. Therapy can feel a safe place for you to experience being the real you and slowly increase your confidence to be authentic in your world.  

Emotional intelligence spans numerous areas such as self-awareness, emotional regulation, conflict resolution etc. You and your therapist can work together to explore and challenge areas of growth and areas of stagnation. The key here is that this is a collaboration between you and your therapist and together you will find new ways of being.

Empathy is an important skill in helping you understand and share another’s feelings. Being able to do so can be significant in relationships and feeling seen and heard. Honing our empathy skills can support greater relationship harmony because you can potentially predict more accurately the impact on a partner/s of any given event. It helps to develop trust, open communication and generally a more positive relational space from which to live life.

Some clients will come into therapy following a significant event that has impacted them, such as a bereavement, redundancy, retirement. Others however might come following the slow build of numerous issues that have served to overwhelm and overload the individual involved. Some clients might find that their needs are directly linked to work stress and performance expectations, but others might find that it is relationships that cause them the greatest distress. Whatever the circumstances there is a therapy to help. 

Life can be hard and none of us are exempt from the challenges life can present and these challenges can expose you to traumas that are far reaching and deeply impactful. Trauma can leave us feelings unsafe in the world and, as a result, can impact negatively on our thoughts, emotions and behaviours. Trauma needs a safe place to be processed and a safe person to process it with. Therapy can offer that. 

Relational trauma will impact other relationships and might prove harmful to self and others. Therapy can help you understand how this is happening and also explore options to change it. We can find ourselves with negative expectations of others as a result of our past, and these can prove very damaging to current relationships. Being able to understand how these patterns emerge and how to stop this is critical and this can be done in both individual or relationship therapy.  

Adult therapy, whilst it can feel uncomfortable and challenging at times, it can also get to the root of our insecurities and fears and then support you to find ways to manage these insecurities and fears. Fear, at its most extreme is paralysing. Therapy can help you gently explore what is happening with a view to finding the right support to be able to move from paralysis to activity, from avoidance to engagement.  

Strong social support, positive communication, and a sense of connection can lead to greater career satisfaction, motivation, and even higher earning potential.

Adult therapy really can make a difference, not just to yourself, but within your relationships and workplace. Support is just a click or phone call away and can be the first step towards a better you. Discover the transformative power of adult psychotherapy today and learn firsthand the benefits it can give you. 

The Problem with ‘Mental Health’!

In the media we often hear of a mental health crisis amongst young people and we are aware of long waiting times for many mental health services for children and young people. Many educators will have observed an increasing number of young people who seem to be experiencing difficulties in managing the challenges of everyday life. But what do we mean when we talk about ‘mental health problems’? We may be thinking of the emotional distress that we witness in the young people we know, an increasing  number of behaviours that challenge, school avoidance, or perhaps other changes in behaviour that we observe.  But is it helpful to frame these emotional and behavioural challenges as mental health problems?

Thinking of the challenges in terms of mental health can certainly have advantages. It can help us to have sympathy for the person who is struggling and to avoid blame. If the problem is one of mental health, then it is not the fault of the sufferer- they need help rather than judgement- and a diagnosis can open doors to support. On the other hand, a label of mental illness may lead to a sense of inevitability and a belief that there is nothing that can be done without the help of a mental health specialist, and this is often not the case. There are many things that can be done by supportive peers, adults and perhaps even the person who is struggling. 

One factor, which may increase resilience and mitigate difficulties such as low mood and anxiety and associated behaviours, is the way that we speak to ourselves and others. We can keep in mind that it is not the fault of the individual that they are struggling, whilst at the same time believing that with appropriate support they can learn to take responsibility for how they manage their struggles. Modelling this way of thinking in how we relate to ourselves and others can play an important role. Do we demonstrate gentleness and compassion towards ourselves and others in our everyday interactions? Some of us may find self-compassion the greater challenge, but if we can say lightly to young people, “This is hard/I made a mistake, it’s okay, and this is what I’m going to do about it”, we are modelling something helpful. Being seen to be perfectionistic or drive ourselves too hard is less helpful.

When we are ourselves under huge pressure to perform and feel criticised, it can be hard to hold onto our intention to nurture rather than pressurise and criticise ourselves and others. Systems that are punitive do not help to get the best out of us, and neither do systems where resources are over-stretched. Phrases like ‘helping the helper’ or ‘filling our own cup first’ may be cliches, but it is true to say that if we are going to do our best for young people, we need to make sure that those charged with their care are adequately resourced. In an educational setting, this could mean many things. Are the adults in schools sufficiently supported? Do pressures on their time mean that it is difficult for them to notice what is going on for students and talk to them about it? Do they receive training that enables them to identify emotional challenges in young people and feel confident about responding appropriately themselves and/or making referrals where needed?

In order to understand the emotional and behavioural responses of young people and adults, we need to consider the context. Some contextual factors occurring within the educational setting can be addressed, whilst other environmental factors, such as poverty and a lack of investment in community facilities for young people, may seem beyond our power to change. Nevertheless, they should be acknowledged.

While the label of ‘mental health’ can facilitate understanding and improve access to support, it also brings the risk of pathologising ‘normal’ and even healthy responses. For example, feeling ‘anxious’ before giving a presentation or sitting an exam may feel uncomfortable, but it is a useful response which can help us to focus and perform at our best. While higher levels of anxiety might inhibit good performance, if we always avoid anxiety-provoking situations we will not learn to manage them well. The line between what is ‘normal’ and what is ‘problematic’ is not always clear, but psychologists tend to consider that professional support may be needed where the level of distress is high and there is a significant impact on the individual’s daily living. We all have ‘good’ days and ‘bad’ days, but if distress is more prolonged and impactful then it may be time to seek help from an appropriately qualified child psychologist, psychotherapist or counsellor.

In conclusion, the label of ‘mental health’ may be helpful in reducing the blame the young person might otherwise experience from themselves or others, and it may help them access appropriate support. Less positively, it may pathologise ‘normal’ experiences, for example of anxiety and low mood, and inhibit us from doing what we can to address what is happening. It may also deflect attention away from systemic factors that need to be addressed, locating the problem within the individual rather than encouraging us to look at the wider issues impacting on them. 

The Retreat Clinics York – Temporary Closure Announcement

Important Notice

We want to keep you informed and updated. The Retreat Clinics in York is temporarily closed while we undergo necessary construction work to enhance our facilities and improve your experience. We appreciate your patience and understanding during this time.

Why Are We Closed?

Our commitment is to provide top-quality care in a comfortable and modern setting. To achieve this, our York location is undergoing a full renovation to upgrade and expand our services. This temporary closure ensures we can complete this work as quickly and safely as possible.

Stay Updated on Construction Progress

We’ll regularly post construction updates here to keep you in the loop as our progress continues. Check back soon to see the latest photos, milestones, and anticipated reopening dates.

If you have specific questions about the updates, feel free to reach out using the contact information below.

Need Assistance? Here’s How to Contact Us

While our York location is temporarily unavailable, we’re still here to help. Please contact us through the options below:

• Phone: 01904 412 551
• Email: york@theretreatclinics.org.uk

Alternative Locations

• Manchester phone: 0161 445 2099
• Manchester email: manchester@theretreatclinics.org.uk

Our team is happy to assist with any inquiries or redirect you to alternative services.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can I book an appointment at another location?

Yes! We’re happy to assist you at our alternative locations. Please contact us for more information and appointment scheduling.

Will my previous booking be rescheduled?

If you had an appointment scheduled at our York location, our team will reach out to assist in rescheduling or guide you to an alternative option.

How can I stay informed?

Simply revisit this page, or subscribe to our updates via this link.

Rest assured, our dedication to your care does not pause during this construction. Please continue to reach out with any questions or concerns.

Thank You for Your Support

We sincerely appreciate your patience as we work to make The Retreat Clinics in York better for you. We are excited to welcome you back soon to a fully refreshed, modern clinic designed with your needs in mind.

Stay tuned here for updates, and please feel free to reach out if you have any questions.

Warm regards,
The Retreat Clinics Team

National Stress Awareness Day 2024

As National Stress Awareness Day rolls around, it’s time to take a moment to reflect on the state of our collective mental well-being and what can be done to support it. 

National Stress Awareness Day, observed on Wednesday, 6th November 2024, is an important initiative aimed at raising awareness of psychological distress, particularly in the workplace. 

Founded by the International Stress Management Association (ISMA), National Stress Awareness Day encourages us to talk openly about stress and discover effective management strategies that work for us.

With rising stress levels affecting people across all sectors of society, it’s more important than ever to explore ways to manage and reduce stress. 

How to Identify Stress vs. Anxiety

While stress and anxiety are often used interchangeably, they are different experiences.

 Stress is typically a reaction to an external trigger (like a work deadline), and when the cause is removed, the stress generally subsides. 

Anxiety, on the other hand, often persists even in the absence of an immediate threat and may manifest as excessive worry, restlessness, or fear of future events.

Here are some key differences:

• Stress is usually linked to a specific event or situation, such as a major project at work.
• Anxiety tends to be more pervasive, not necessarily tied to any particular external circumstance, and can linger long after the stressor is gone.
• Physical symptoms like headaches, muscle tension, and sleep issues are common to both, but anxiety may also include feelings of dread, difficulty concentrating, and panic attacks.

A Growing National Concern

Recent data from the UK Measures of National Well-being Dashboard confirms what many of us already know: stress is a pervasive issue in the UK. 

While mental well-being was already a concern before the pandemic, anxiety levels have remained significantly higher compared to pre-pandemic rates. 

The Office for National Statistics (ONS) notes that mental health, particularly anxiety, continues to affect life satisfaction across the nation.

For many, this stress comes from economic pressures. The ONS dashboard highlights that financial insecurity—be it due to housing costs, job instability, or rising living expenses—remains a top stressor for many UK citizens. 

At a time when the cost of living continues to rise, stress levels follow suit. 

This is especially relevant for those who feel vulnerable in the face of economic uncertainty.

We see the effects of this daily in our work. The connection between financial strain and mental health cannot be ignored, and addressing both the physical and emotional impacts of stress is key to long-term recovery.

More Than Just Deadlines

You know that feeling when you have a tight deadline looming? That’s stress in action! It’s something we all experience – especially at work.

A 2024 report published in Forbes found that 36% of managers feel burnt out, and many are considering leaving their jobs due to stress. 

The UK Measures of Well-being Dashboard also notes that work-related stress contributes significantly to lower well-being scores, particularly for individuals in leadership roles.

Job insecurity, long hours, and an ever-increasing workload are common culprits, leading to feelings of burnout and anxiety.

What’s more, a lack of psychological safety in the workplace can exacerbate these feelings. 

Employees who feel unsupported by their managers, or isolated by their workplace culture, are much more likely to experience stress. 

In contrast, strong managerial support can reduce work-related stress by as much as 56%, according to findings from meQuilibrium

This reinforces the importance of not only individual stress management but also organizational responsibility in creating healthier, more supportive work environments.

The Role of Social and Community Support

Beyond the workplace, social connections and community support are vital to mental well-being. The ONS explains that individuals who report strong social connections tend to experience lower levels of stress and anxiety. 

This highlights the importance of fostering a sense of community as a way to combat loneliness and isolation, which are significant contributors to poor mental health.

We are proud to sponsor local events that strengthen our ties to the community, such as the Withington Pride event this summer. Participating in such events not only fosters a sense of belonging but also helps promote mental well-being in an inclusive environment. 

You can check out an image of us at the event here

Research shows that people with strong social support networks are far more likely to experience lower anxiety levels and better overall life satisfaction. 

Physical Health and the Environment

It’s easy to think of stress as something purely mental, but the ONS well-being data reminds us of the strong link between physical health and stress. 

Individuals who are physically active or have access to green spaces report significantly higher levels of life satisfaction and lower stress levels. 

Simple activities like walking in nature, practicing yoga, or participating in mindful movement can have a profound impact on your mental well-being.

What Can You Do on National Stress Awareness Day?

National Stress Awareness Day is the perfect opportunity to take stock of your mental health and explore ways to reduce stress. 

Here are a few evidence-based strategies that can make a difference:

1. Mindfulness and Meditation:

These practices help ground you in the present moment, reducing the tendency to dwell on stressors. Apps like Headspace and Calm offer guided meditations specifically designed for stress relief.

Adding simple breathing techniques to your meditation practice, such as box breathing or diaphragmatic breathing, can quickly lower stress levels by calming the nervous system.

2. Physical Activity

Whether it’s a brisk walk, yoga, or a fitness class, physical activity can significantly reduce stress levels and improve your mood.

3. Seek Social Connections:

Reach out to friends, family, or support groups. Building a strong support network is crucial for long-term stress management.

4. Professional Help:

If you feel overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to seek professional help. At The Retreat, we offer tailored therapeutic services that focus on treating the root causes of stress.

Moving Forward

By recognising the complexity of stress—whether it’s economic, social, or environmental—we can better understand how to navigate life’s challenges.

National Stress Awareness Day is a reminder that we are all in this together, and there is help available. 

Whether facing financial strain, work-related burnout, or the everyday pressures of life, there are solutions that work.

Let’s make well-being a priority, not just for today, but for every day.

Don’t forget to check out our podcast for insights on mental well-being, holistic health, and personal stories that inspire.

If you’d like to learn more about how The Retreat Clinics can support you, contact us today to speak with a member of our team.