“Dad, What’s Autism?” – How to Talk to Children About Autism
“Dad, What’s Autism?” – How to Talk to Children About Autism
Explaining autism to children can feel daunting. You might not feel like you fully understand it yourself, or you may worry about saying the “wrong” thing. Children are naturally curious, though, and that curiosity is a positive starting point. Often it’s our own preconceptions or anxieties that make us clam up.
One of the best first steps is to reflect on your own understanding: what does autism mean to you? Do you feel confident in how you’d explain it? If not, that’s okay. These conversations don’t have to be perfect, and they don’t have to happen all at once. What matters is being open, honest, and willing to learn alongside your child.
This guide offers some tips and starting points to help you feel more comfortable when your child asks questions like “What’s autism?” or when you want to introduce the topic yourself.
Be Curious About Their Curiosity
If your child asks about autism, take a moment to understand where the question is coming from.
- Have they met or become friends with someone who is autistic?
- Have they heard it mentioned at school or on TV?
- Are they trying to make sense of differences they’ve noticed in others or themselves?
Asking gentle follow-up questions can help you pitch your explanation at the right level and connect it to their world.
Keep It Simple and Honest
Children don’t need long technical explanations. They need clarity, reassurance, and words they can relate to.
- For younger children: You don’t need complicated explanations. One way to frame it is through the idea of different neurotypes. We all have a brain, and our brain is like the engine room that helps us think, learn, and understand the world. Brains can work in different ways, and one of those ways is an autistic brain. An autistic brain notices, processes, and responds to the world differently. That difference is part of what makes someone who they are.
- For older children, you can go into a little more detail about how an autistic brain might work. You might explain that autistic brains can sometimes notice details that other people miss, or that they can find patterns more easily. You might talk about how some autistic people experience the world very vividly, which can make bright lights or loud noises uncomfortable, but can also make interests and passions feel especially powerful. You could explain that moving between tasks or changes in routine can sometimes feel harder, because the autistic brain likes to know what to expect.
Celebrate Difference and Individuality
One of the most important messages for children to hear is: no two autistic people are the same because no two humans are the same. Autism is one part of who someone is, and every autistic person has their own personality, interests, and needs.
That also means the kind of support an autistic child might need can vary. Some may need help with certain activities at school, while others may not. Children often notice these differences, and talking about them openly helps remove mystery or stigma.
Introduce Positive Role Models
It can be powerful for children to see autistic people represented as role models, whether that’s authors, scientists, athletes, or creators. Sharing these stories shows that autism is not something to hide or fear, but something that can shape unique talents and perspectives.
From well-known figures like Greta Thunberg to local or family role models, these examples help children see the real, positive impact of neurodiversity in the world.
Make Use of Stories and Resources
Books and videos can be a really helpful way to support these conversations. They give children another way to access the information, at their own pace, and allow them to dip in and out as their curiosity grows. Some useful resources include:
- Books: Wonderfully Wired by Louise Gooding,
- Videos: Amazing Things Happen by Alexander Amelines (via the National Autistic Society)
- TV/Online: Pablo – Talking to Your Child About Autism (CBeebies website)
- Organisations:
- The Curly Hair Project – comics, animations, and stories based on lived experience
- The National Autistic Society – wide range of parent and child-friendly resources
These resources can help children explore autism in ways that are engaging, relatable, and affirming.
Keep the Conversation Going
Explaining autism isn’t a one-time event. It’s an ongoing conversation that will grow and change as your child does. They might return with new questions after something happens at school, after watching a film, or as they develop more self-awareness.
You don’t need to have all the answers at once. What matters is showing that you’re open to talking, listening, and learning together.
Why These Conversations Matter
When we talk to children about autism, we’re not only helping them understand themselves or their peers, we’re shaping a more compassionate and inclusive future. Neurodiversity is a part of human variation. By recognising this difference as part of the variety of life, we help children grow up seeing it as a valuable and part of the very fabric of our communities.
So, the next time your child asks, “What’s autism?”, see it as the opportunity it is. You don’t need the perfect answer, what matters most is starting the conversation.
And if you think your child may be neurodiverse, or you’ve recently received a diagnosis, you don’t have to navigate the journey alone. At The Retreat Clinics, we’re here to support you and your family with understanding, confidence, and practical strategies every step of the way. Call 01904 412 551 to book an appointment today.
Private Appointments: Specialist Assessment For Autism And Therapy For Neurodivergent Children and Young People
Diagnostic Assessments:
We are now accepting private referrals for formal autism diagnostic assessments for children and young people. We appreciate waiting lists can be long and how difficult it can be to wait for diagnostic assessments. Our experienced team can help – we follow NICE guidelines to provide our assessment service and offer a multidisciplinary team approach to every young person and family.
Therapy:
If autism, ADHD or another neurodivergent diagnosis has been made, and you’d like some additional support, we may be able to help. We have a highly experienced and friendly team – and we can help you to figure out which one of these people would be best suited to support you and your child. Once we receive your self-referral, our team will be in touch to discuss what we may be able to offer. We can help you to explore things such as sensory differences, communication and social interaction, anxiety and other mental health difficulties, issues around schooling, understanding of autism/ADHD and what a diagnosis means to you and your family, and many more things.
If you would like to find out more please get in touch by using the form below, or emailing cypinfo@theretreatclinics.org.uk or telephone 01904 412 551 (option 3)